Thursday, October 2, 2008

Palintology

Quick!

1)  Is the Earth 6,000 years old?

2)  Has there been more than one Supreme Court decision?

3)  Has John McCain accomplished one specific thing in his 28 year public career?

4)  Is dear Sister Sarah really Tina Fey in disguise?

I personally believe the answers to the above are obvious, though not as much as you think to #4.  She's really Caitlin Upton.  Can't wait for her answers tonight about maps, South Africa, the Iraq, and Asian countries.  Everywhere like such as.

So we can build up our future.  For us.

 - US Americans for Palin

Wool?!?

Dearest Lady Guinevere,

Gatherest thou the wool of your finest sheep and spinnest me I beg a mere swatch of cloth for I to take unto battle!

For our good and faire King shall slaughter his kingdom's best oxen upon which we shall sup! And thereafter, I bid thee to save all your reciepts so as to declare the proper deductions and subsidies in your 2008 tax return.  Tho the Good King's treasure has been wontonly squandered, he gladly giveth over to you the spoilt remains of all that has been picked over. For the rest shall be plundered by corporate raiders; bondsman of the Orient I say.

I remain yours forever, glad to have sacrificed all I hath earnethed in humble tribute to that which never could have been sought in any faire or just land before or since,

 - Babbitt

The Road leads where it's Led


Well the European chickens are coming home to roost:  France seeks $500 Billion Bailout for European Banks.  I'm sorry, Jean-Pierre.  I must have missed your apology for mocking the USA's fiscal morass last week.  Sie auch, Klaus.  Dum Arsch!

Meanwhile, the US Senate has started the process to simultaneously buy us off and sell us out. $200 million for Puerto Rican rum producers.  $480 million for movie & TV producers. $109 million for NASCAR race tracks.  What's another $200,000 for wooden practice arrow manufacturers?  And why not another few million for the wool trust fund?  Wool?!?

Hey, all this only adds another $100 billion to the package.  Besides they threw in a couple mental health care provisions.  We'll need it.

Pass the rum!


[Full Senate text here.  At 451 pages of dense legalese, I'm still reading the introduction.]

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

More Busting on West Virginia


It's coming up on West Virginia's favorite holiday.  Halloween.  It's when they all get to Pump Kin.

da-da-duh...

West Virginia Sushi


For no good reason, there are a lot of sushi bars in the Mountaineer State.

For every good reason, I wouldn't eat at any of 'em.

A Step in the Right Direction


Ladies and gentlemen, please direct your attention to the 0:23 mark of the upper video linked here.

The Buffalo Sabres appear to be officially gravitating back to a charging bison over two crossed swords.  If it's at center ice today, it's there for the whole season.  This dovetails with the unveiling of the "new" third jersey.  Classic.  And classy!

Season starts Fri - Oct 10th @ 7:30 PM (ET) when BUF hosts the Canadiens de Montreal.

Away Banana Slugs.  Let's Go Buffalo!


Fallout from the Blast

Now it's the day after tomorrow.  The "intelligent" consensus is Congress will eventually get an economic deal done.  I'm confident too they'll come together in the end to sell out the American people.  After all, ours are the best politicians money can buy.

That notion greatly comforts the bourses*, having mostly rebounded after Monday's freefall. But watch out on Main Street.  Industrial production ground to a halt over the last week.  Zip Zero.  Nada.  If you produce steel, cars, machinery, or the like your customers canceled their orders last week.  You in turn canceled orders with your suppliers this week.  Next week it moves up the supply chain.  Bye-bye Christmas bonus.  If you're still employed.

I don't like this bailout plan.  It sickens me -- as you can read two items below -- to the core that reckless spenders, borrowers, and hucksters get made whole.  Why not do it all over again?

However, the current state of affairs means no credit.  No credit means no new buildings, cars, cranes, planes, forklifts, elevators, plumbing, couches, carpet, clothes, and all the other crap we charge.  Americans consume.  Americans borrow to consume.  That's the way it is.

And we pay the monthly installment with wages from our jobs.  Are you feeling pretty saucy because your job isn't in manufacturing or construction?  Don't be.  Folks with jobs order meals at restaurants, buy earrings from the Piercing Pagoda, get their nails done, splurge on strudel, go to football games, take vacations, make sure their cars are insured, and all that other optional fun stuff.

Unemployed people don't.

So, good job Wall Street!  You've created an economic Frankenstein now running roughshod over the country.  And congratulations Congress!  You've shrunk in response to the greatest challenge any of you arrogant fat cats will ever face.  Right on Hanky Paulson!  You told us to give you a $700 billion check and just trust you to do the right thing.

Oh, and the rest of the world.  Don't get smug.  The USA is taking its hits now, but you people haven't even begun pulling on the sweater.  Europe's got the same toxic debt as here.  China is rapidly losing its (one way) trading partner.  Oil prices will follow demand downward hurting those sympathetic Middle Eastern sheiks and rabble rousers.  Third world nations won't be getting aid.

Anybody own a yurt compound?


* Bourse = Stock Market.  I used the more worldly term to ingratiate myself with the Nobel literary committee.  Apparently, US writers are too insular:  link